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The LaBrea Tar Pits Effect

  I call this aspect of myself The LaBrea Tar Pits Effect, because if you have some sticky dirty, naaasty secret to stay a secret, you don't even want me to walk by; because that secret will bubble up & be exposed to the world.  Like Amazon's business model.

  I spoke with an Inspector in the FL prison system yesterday and learned:  (1) "Mr." D who supposedly ordered those 6 zappers from us May 12 of this year is in Suwannee Correctional Institution in FL, & has been since January of 2009, with a release date of December 2017 - provided he behaves himself.  He has a string of convictions for Aggravated Battery with Intent to do Harm - a short step from being charged with attempted murder.  "Mr." D has "an anger-management problem", I'm sure we all agree.
  (2) "Mr." D's mother is also currently incarcerated in the prison system. 
  (3) "Mr." D's father's whereabouts are unknown, but the authorities would like to know. They have questions for him.

 Hmmm....  An example of 'the family that plays together stays together', yes?

  Moreover, inmates in FL are (a) not allowed any access to the Internet at any time; and (b) they are not allowed to have anything that is electronic or uses batteries, because the creative sorts among the prison population turn such things into weapons & drug-production components.

  Therefore - "Mr." D could not have ordered the 6 zappers (to the non-existent address it turns out was given to Amazon), and we have a clear case of mail fraud.  Now it remains to be seen whether "Mr." D is in on the scam, or not.  There are many such scams in existence involving inmates, as a means to get money to buy all the contraband they continually strive to smuggle in to their cells.

  Meantime, the village idiots at Amazon's "Seller Help" continue to maintain Amazon's policy of never taking the Sellers word for anything.  Is that stupid, or what.  Yep, it's stupid. 

  Now to track down the missing mail carrier & find out her story.  She has been on that route "for years", so she knew going in that 714 was not a valid address.  She 'could' have delivered the package anywhere, but the likeliest is 740; and then the questions become, "Who was living there on May 16, 2012 when she scanned the package as delivered"; "Did she hand the package to someone or did she just leave it in the mailbox"; "Is she just a trusting fool, or is she in on the scam?"  A search of her property records shows she owns a very low-value piece of land..  And, "How many pieces of First Class Pkg w. Delivery Confirmation has she mis-delivered?"

  Tar pits being as they are, I suspect this going to get stickier & messier before it's all cleaned up.
  Wishing you great good happy health!

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Reader Comments  (2) | September 26th 2012 at 1348661668

Tar pits, indeed. I had no idea. Hope you get it resolved and the culprit winds up in the cell next to Mr "D" or his mother.

Yes, I know. I have not a charitable bone in my body :)
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Controversial Carel | September 26th 2012 at 1348701861

Oh hanh! / Absolutely!/Me, too! Seems Mr. D's father is a person of interest to the authorities, but I found him with an online Search. Our Postmaster says they should hire me - I agree; & told him they can always hire me as an outside consultant. A paycheck is a nice thing to have, and I'm getting short of cash - which of course is what Amazon hopes for. They think this will stop me from proceeding. NOT HARDLY!

As for your charitable bones, or lack thereof - I have no sympathy for lice like whoever is committing fraud here (or anywhere else), with or without Amazon's assistance. I do apologize for being hard on lice, though.. ;-)

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